My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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