So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
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