Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
