She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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