i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I need a beard to bite.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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