Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
