That's when you crack a 10am beer
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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