ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
