I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
