found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Randomize