i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
