i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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