watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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