so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
They took my balls.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
