i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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