: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
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