genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
