eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
