6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
