grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
