Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
