This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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