Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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