I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Randomize
