Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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