What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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