Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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