My brain says no but my pants say off.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
