I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
