So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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