Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
