I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
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