ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
