I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
