do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
fuck your aforementioned shoe
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
