i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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