I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
