Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
