Whats the glycemic index on semen?
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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