Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
he was CRYING into my vagina
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
