Define "chronic" masturbator.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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