I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
