i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
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