brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
