I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Randomize
