Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
i think im in europe. pls send help
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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