Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
