im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
where am i from again
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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