apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
