My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
